Zakpitced is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, tranquil dragon.

Zakpitced created Asia eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zakpitced, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Zakpitced, he will be mildly annoyed.

Zakpitced's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Zakpitced's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of strawberries to shrews while wearing pink scarves.

2. Never write about ribonucleic acid.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always treat sharks with great respect.

5. Do not make images of living things.