Dagxendub is a god.
It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unthinking
dingo.
Dagxendub created a Higgs boson nine quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Dagxendub, it will grant your every desire.
If you do not believe in
Dagxendub, it will denounce you as a heretic.
Dagxendub's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.
Dagxendub's Holy Commandments1. Never mention cats.
2. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.
3. Do not run in public.
4. Show mercy to disobedient children.
5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.