Dobflabbap is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, grumpy human.

Dobflabbap created light nine million years ago.

If you believe in Dobflabbap, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Dobflabbap, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Dobflabbap's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Dobflabbap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear brown clothing.

2. Dobflabbap loves voles, so they must be respected.

3. Do not speak about lentils.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never write about chromosomes.