Cepbestwapgut is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, selfish seal.

Cepbestwapgut created oxygen seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cepbestwapgut, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Cepbestwapgut, it will try to impress you with trees.

Cepbestwapgut's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Cepbestwapgut's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat coconuts.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Cepbestwapgut loves monkeys, so they must be respected.

4. Do not bounce in public.

5. Do not chop down trees.