Bafkamtal Liktomtetti is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, narcissistic lizard.

Bafkamtal Liktomtetti created Africa five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bafkamtal Liktomtetti, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Bafkamtal Liktomtetti, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Bafkamtal Liktomtetti's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Bafkamtal Liktomtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never talk about chromosomes.

3. Do not bounce in public.

4. Never paint your head fawn.

5. Pray towards the east.