Cunstigrig is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, contented goblin.

Cunstigrig created the planet Saturn twelve years ago.

If you believe in Cunstigrig, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Cunstigrig, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Cunstigrig's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Cunstigrig's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never talk about quantum mechanics near snakes while wearing blue stockings.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Cunstigrig.

5. Moths are unholy and should not be approached.