Kaddabwon is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, strong squirrel.

Kaddabwon created a down quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kaddabwon, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kaddabwon, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Kaddabwon's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Kaddabwon's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not eat nuts.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. Never mention voles.

5. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.