Stannelsog is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, witty spider.

Stannelsog created everything that exists four billion years ago.

If you believe in Stannelsog, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Stannelsog, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Stannelsog's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Stannelsog's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about thermodynamics near manatees while wearing indigo skirts.

2. Run away from red eagles, for they are unholy.

3. Do not eat figs.

4. Never wear trousers.

5. Hide if five hamsters approach from the north.