Hakrilldaddiss is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, generous porpoise.

Hakrilldaddiss created dark energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Hakrilldaddiss, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Hakrilldaddiss, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Hakrilldaddiss' most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Hakrilldaddiss' Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

3. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not hurt squirrels.

5. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in white.