Kopjadhad is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, self-confident slug.

Kopjadhad created a bottom quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kopjadhad, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Kopjadhad, she will destroy your favourite star.

Kopjadhad's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Kopjadhad's Holy Commandments

1. Kopjadhad must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. You must pray to Kopjadhad five times a day.

4. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Kopjadhad in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never eat bark.