Bissgebwik is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, flying weasel.

Bissgebwik created everything that exists five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bissgebwik, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bissgebwik, it will jump up and down on your head.

Bissgebwik's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Bissgebwik's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in holy places.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Bissgebwik on top of all buildings.

5. Do not speak about lentils.