Bissjandin is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, all-powerful whale.

Bissjandin created the Cigar Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bissjandin, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bissjandin, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Bissjandin's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Bissjandin's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large copper sculpture of Bissjandin on top of all buildings.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.