Fasjigtim Himquatstan Sanlagcum is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, proud hippopotamus.

Fasjigtim Himquatstan Sanlagcum created light six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fasjigtim Himquatstan Sanlagcum, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fasjigtim Himquatstan Sanlagcum, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Fasjigtim Himquatstan Sanlagcum's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Fasjigtim Himquatstan Sanlagcum's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat aubergines.

2. Hide if eight foxes approach from the west.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always help rats in need.

5. Never talk about gravity.