Nanbatbug is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, amazing chinchilla.

Nanbatbug created Africa two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nanbatbug, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nanbatbug, he will not invite you to parties.

Nanbatbug's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Nanbatbug's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate voles.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Nanbatbug.

5. Never think about fluid mechanics near monkeys while wearing fawn stockings and balancing nine platinum spheres on your neck.