Hamhonbab Arpinggod is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, quiet cat.

Hamhonbab Arpinggod created the Black Eye Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hamhonbab Arpinggod, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Hamhonbab Arpinggod, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Hamhonbab Arpinggod's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Hamhonbab Arpinggod's Holy Commandments

1. Hamhonbab Arpinggod loves monkeys, so they must be respected.

2. Always obey Hamhonbab Arpinggod's priests.

3. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not cook food in pots.