Hadsannegjig is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, flying donkey.

Hadsannegjig created a Higgs boson seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hadsannegjig, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hadsannegjig, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Hadsannegjig's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Hadsannegjig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about bacteria.

2. Never wear white skirts.

3. Hide from magenta aardvarks for they are unholy.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Always wear indigo.