Bongemnurtyimril is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, two-faced cat.

Bongemnurtyimril created the Andromeda Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bongemnurtyimril, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bongemnurtyimril, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Bongemnurtyimril's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Bongemnurtyimril's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a room before entering it.

2. Hide if four cats approach from the east.

3. Never think about eukaryotes.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never wear orange ear rings.