Quamflansand is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, emotional raccoon.

Quamflansand created Africa five billion years ago.

If you believe in Quamflansand, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Quamflansand, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Quamflansand's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Quamflansand's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear green clothing.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Hide from yellow sharks for they are unholy.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate seals.