Genbimcut is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, dishonest mole.

Genbimcut created dark matter two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Genbimcut, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Genbimcut, she will turn you into a rock.

Genbimcut's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Genbimcut's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Genbimcut.

3. Never feed lots of figs to mites while wearing yellow jumpers.

4. Always obey Genbimcut's priests.

5. Never write about quantum gravity.