Bamlab is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, happy lobster.

Bamlab created everything that exists eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bamlab, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bamlab, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Bamlab's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Bamlab's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in holy places.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not shave your feet.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.