Dabquimhenvoldad is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, all-knowing capybara.

Dabquimhenvoldad created an atom three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dabquimhenvoldad, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Dabquimhenvoldad, he will destroy your favourite star.

Dabquimhenvoldad's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Dabquimhenvoldad's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into fawn rooms.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never write about electromagnetism.

4. Run away from cyan voles, for they are unholy.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.