Bastjanlarn is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, quiet slug.

Bastjanlarn created matter nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bastjanlarn, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bastjanlarn, it will try to impress you with trees.

Bastjanlarn's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Bastjanlarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about otters.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Always treat mites with great respect.

4. Always wear gray.

5. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in orange.