Bestponqueeg is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, weak chinchilla.

Bestponqueeg created light seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bestponqueeg, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Bestponqueeg, she will make you grow a tail.

Bestponqueeg's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Bestponqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Do not eat bananas.

3. Never talk about goats.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not wear carbon on your body.