Hakgom is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, sapient cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Hakgom created the Tadpole Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hakgom, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Hakgom, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Hakgom's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Hakgom's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Hakgom in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never think about optics near dogs while wearing brown shoes and balancing five copper spheres on your feet.

3. Never feed lots of tomatoes to moths while wearing green kilts.

4. Do not jump in public.

5. Always help ants in need.