Yatvadbag is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, staggering fairy.

Yatvadbag created the Small Magellanic Cloud six billion years ago.

If you believe in Yatvadbag, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Yatvadbag, it will turn you into a mouse.

Yatvadbag's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Yatvadbag's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear turquoise coats.

2. Never talk about special relativity near monkeys while wearing orange corsets and balancing six titanium spheres on your hands.

3. Never think ill of sick bats.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never talk about moons.