Xuckbudcub is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, narcissistic unicorn.

Xuckbudcub created the Sun four billion years ago.

If you believe in Xuckbudcub, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Xuckbudcub, it will turn you into a puffin.

Xuckbudcub's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Xuckbudcub's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Xuckbudcub in the centre of the settlement.

2. Erect five silver sculptures of Xuckbudcub on top of important buildings.

3. Worship no other gods but Xuckbudcub.

4. Always help bats in need.

5. Pray towards the east.