Metripsog is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unfair dove.

Metripsog created dark energy two million years ago.

If you believe in Metripsog, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Metripsog, he will turn you into a rat.

Metripsog's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Metripsog's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always help grasshopers in need.

4. Always treat seals with great respect.

5. Pray towards the west.