Yarkanbid is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, happy dingo.

Yarkanbid created life eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarkanbid, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Yarkanbid, he will turn you into a mole.

Yarkanbid's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Yarkanbid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Hide from cyan snails for they are unholy.

3. You must never eat coconuts.

4. Never laugh in the presence of swans.

5. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.