Figyamgumgep is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, quiet grasshopper.

Figyamgumgep created snails three million years ago.

If you believe in Figyamgumgep, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Figyamgumgep, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Figyamgumgep's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Figyamgumgep's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear dresses.

2. Always help turtles in need.

3. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Figyamgumgep.

5. Shrews are unholy and should not be approached.