Somzedten is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, able meerkat.

Somzedten created everything that exists two billion years ago.

If you believe in Somzedten, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Somzedten, she will turn you into a mole.

Somzedten's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Somzedten's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Somzedten.

2. You must pray to Somzedten four times a day.

3. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

4. Do not drink water in magenta rooms.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.