Himontzig is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, vain hippopotamus.

Himontzig created a bottom quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Himontzig, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Himontzig, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Himontzig's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Himontzig's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into violet rooms.

2. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Himontzig in the centre of the settlement.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Retreat if four ducks approach from the south.

5. Never pour water over plants.