Yartgenmad is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, thoughtless wyrm.

Yartgenmad created the Whirlpool Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yartgenmad, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Yartgenmad, it will jump up and down on your head.

Yartgenmad's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Yartgenmad's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Yartgenmad.

2. Do not wear red clothing.

3. Learn four new languages a year.

4. Always wear orange.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.