Bastlarnwikfobnurt is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, intelligent fish.

Bastlarnwikfobnurt created the Black Eye Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Bastlarnwikfobnurt, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bastlarnwikfobnurt, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Bastlarnwikfobnurt's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Bastlarnwikfobnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never think about quantum field theory.

3. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

4. Never wear boots.

5. Do not keep six gulls in a large pit.