Hitham is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, annoying goose.

Hitham created a photon four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hitham, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Hitham, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Hitham's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Hitham's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear fawn shorts.

2. Erect five copper sculptures of Hitham on top of important buildings.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always help sick badgers.

5. Do not hurt swans.