Jonwiprull is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, boastful elephant.

Jonwiprull created the Cigar Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Jonwiprull, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Jonwiprull, it will torture you forever.

Jonwiprull's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Jonwiprull's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from indigo hamsters, for they are unholy.

2. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never think about black holes.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.