Nantarpfot is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, irritating snail.

Nantarpfot created light eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nantarpfot, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nantarpfot, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Nantarpfot's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Nantarpfot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Always obey Nantarpfot's priests.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Always look after injured sharks.