Bif is a god.

She takes the form of a small, blissful lion.

Bif created a Higgs boson five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bif, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bif, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Bif's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Bif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never mention sharks.

4. Do not eat nuts.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.