Arnnarlab is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, awesome giraffe.

Arnnarlab created life eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Arnnarlab, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Arnnarlab, she will be very sad.

Arnnarlab's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Arnnarlab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always treat gulls with great respect.

4. Never think about thermodynamics near turtles while wearing magenta boots and balancing six silver spheres on your head.

5. Do not take Arnnarlab's name in vain.