Sogjadril is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, vain alligator.

Sogjadril created humankind three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sogjadril, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Sogjadril, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Sogjadril's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Sogjadril's Holy Commandments

1. Do not jump in public.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate mice.

4. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

5. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Sogjadril on top of all buildings.