Ratmisvonk is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, unfair fish.

Ratmisvonk created the Tadpole Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ratmisvonk, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Ratmisvonk, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Ratmisvonk's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Ratmisvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never go into mauve rooms.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Worship no other gods but Ratmisvonk.

5. Hide if six goats approach from the east.