Gidyiktaf is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unfair octopus.

Gidyiktaf created snails seven million years ago.

If you believe in Gidyiktaf, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gidyiktaf, she will send you a sign.

Gidyiktaf's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Gidyiktaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate dogs.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never feed lots of gooseberries to manatees while wearing black corsets.

5. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.