Quatdapwab is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, competent cow.

Quatdapwab created the planet Venus nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quatdapwab, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Quatdapwab, he will turn you into a worm.

Quatdapwab's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Quatdapwab's Holy Commandments

1. Always help mice in need.

2. Do not hurt turtles.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not wear mauve clothing.

5. Never think ill of sick horses.