Ventallim is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, all-powerful squid.

Ventallim created the Cigar Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Ventallim, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Ventallim, he will manifest in front of you.

Ventallim's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Ventallim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill ducks.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never sing in holy places.

4. Snakes are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Do not dye your hair brown.