Laptetticim is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, competent duck.

Laptetticim created gold five million years ago.

If you believe in Laptetticim, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Laptetticim, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Laptetticim's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Laptetticim's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Laptetticim's priests.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never wear shoes.

4. Never wear pink tights.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.