Flowgigwik is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, competent gorilla.

Flowgigwik created an up quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Flowgigwik, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Flowgigwik, she will not care.

Flowgigwik's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Flowgigwik's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three sheep approach from the north.

2. You must love Flowgigwik.

3. Always treat squirrels with great respect.

4. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

5. Never go into magenta rooms.