Gessbepdub is a god.

She takes the form of a small, dishonest wolf.

Gessbepdub created a photon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gessbepdub, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gessbepdub, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Gessbepdub's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Gessbepdub's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Gessbepdub's priests.

2. Do not dye your hair fawn.

3. Always treat squirrels with great respect.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Run away if eight ants approach from the north.