Mumyartnul is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, astonishing spider.

Mumyartnul created the planet Jupiter four million years ago.

If you believe in Mumyartnul, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Mumyartnul, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Mumyartnul's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Mumyartnul's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never sprint in holy places.

5. You must pray to Mumyartnul five times a day.