Arpfiddim is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, weak camel.

Arpfiddim created gold four billion years ago.

If you believe in Arpfiddim, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Arpfiddim, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Arpfiddim's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Arpfiddim's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about thermodynamics.

2. Never think ill of sick horses.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never skip near sheep.