Largrawvid is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, unthoughtful lizard.

Largrawvid created the planet Saturn nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Largrawvid, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Largrawvid, he will destroy your home planet.

Largrawvid's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Largrawvid's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if seven doves approach from the east.

2. Do not hurt goats.

3. Never talk about otters.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never skip in holy places.