Bodlentarg is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, ruthless bear.

Bodlentarg created viruses eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bodlentarg, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bodlentarg, he will turn you into a snail.

Bodlentarg's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Bodlentarg's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant near voles.

2. Never write about bacteria.

3. Feed all hungry geese.

4. Never feed lots of beans to birds while wearing green kilts.

5. Fast once a month.